Do you know how to play the game? Was it worth it? (extremely graphic)

This is going to be my most graphic post about my father and what he went through just to do what was right, not only for love of God and country, but also for love of himself. His act was not to protect his worldy being, but his spirit, his conscience, which according to him, was worth more and transcended all that the material world had to offer.

When my dad was killed there were some comments about how my dad just did not know how to play the game. Their premise was that government in general was dirty, and that my dad, should have known when and when not to "play the game". Especially when his life was put at stake.

As a backgrounder, my Dad did not accept a bribe from a drug lord whom he sentenced to death. On June 10, 2004, according to eye-witness accounts, as he left his Court, barely 5 meters away, his car was blocked off by an armed group of thugs. Both in front and in the back while the assailant went up to my dad's driver's side where he was driving and shot my father 10 times in the head. He survived for a bit longer, but that story can be better told by clicking here.

This reminds me of one of the most common topics of discussion between my father and I; "Was it worth it?"

I used to ask him, was it really worth it NOT to accept the money? The world will surely still go round despite a few of his lapses, and it will work out later. What if all this other-world talk meant nothing because there was nothing after this life? What if after all this we just died and nothing of us was left except the dust of our disintegrated body? If such were so, everything he had done would be fruitless and he'd be leaving the people he loved behind.

My dad would simply answer, "If this is the only world we have, then I might as well make it good".

It's another Halloween again without my dad. I can't help but remember him after what he went through, after what we, as a family had to go through. The mental images are hard to erase. The shot up car, him all bloody and dying with several gun shots all over him. He was shot at least ten times in the head. They wanted to make sure he was dead. They sent groups of people after one man. It was their third try, but they had to take him out for good. The doctor once told me that it was post traumatic stress and these things are extremely difficult to just blank out. Maybe that how soldiers who see their close friends die feel.

Having had a Forensic Medicine class recently aggravated the memory. Being forced (for academic purposes) to view autopsies of other people who have been shot (Ninoy Aquino and other notables), I was reminded of the same pictures I had seen of my own father. I imagined the sticks they had to stick through his head to figure out the trajectory of the bullets and the cause of death.

I've unearthed some very old pictures from my dad's case.

Obviously I won't show you the pictures of my dad, but I can show you pictures of the vehicle he was in. Let it speak for itself of the pain we all had to go through, that day when his car was blocked off by gunmen and he was shot in cold blood. The keys I remember he used to carry around to lock the evidence room went missing, and the drugs from the case supposedly disappeared. All because he did not play the game.

I would like to end this post with some hope. To all those who feel this government does nothing, take heart that not all government officials are crooked. There are many I have met who want to do what is right. They risk their life, and because of the nature of being a public official, the lives and happiness of their family as well.

This is for all those in public service who have tried and continue to make a difference. From the cops in the field to the government desk jockeys, truth is on your side, and you will live on in every life you have touched.


RIP +++
Judge Voltaire Antonio Ylagan Rosales
May 30, 1956 - June 10, 2004

There's Always a Way to Serve

One of my Dad's pride and joy was the fact that he was a Eucharistic Minister. In serving God he found solace from all the ills that he had to face as a heinous crimes judge.

There was one story that touched my family deeply, which was conveyed to us during his wake by a lay minister that served with him in Santuario de San Antonio.

The lay minister told us that there was an election for President for our local Parish. To put this in context, our local parish is unique in the sense that it's members were not the usual masses that Jesus speaks of in the gospel. Santuario de San Antonio, Forbes Park Makati is home to followers of the faith who belong to the richest part of Philippine society.

Being President was not merely a call to serve God, but also, limelight in the presence of those by themselves were famous already, if not for their wealth, but for their place in Philippine society as a whole.

My father was not one for the limelight, this was one thing he had in common with Governor Dodo Mandanas of Batanagas (a relative, who would  introduce my father as his kin to people). They both did not like to use sirens when traveling. He felt it was unnecessary and should only be used for emergency situations. Yet, he was nominated by his peers in the church for the position. It did not make him comfortable, but he believed that if God wanted him to serve this way, then so be it.

The nominees were asked to introduce themselves before the committee and say why they should be voted President. We were told that the first nominee spoke on how he was able to donate for the sake of charity to the Barangay of San Antonio, Makati and was experienced in giving to the community.

My father was not one to upstage others, especially when the end-purpose was just to serve the public. When it was my father's turn, he said thank you to the previous speaker, and that having grown up in San Antonio, Makati, he was most likely a beneficiary of such gracious donations that the speaker spoke of. He then humbly offered himself to the committee, stating that he could not give financial contributions but promised to dedicate his time and efforts if he were elected.

We were told that in the end, it looked like a race between my father and an older lady.


The ballots were tallied. It was a secret ballot. My father lost by one vote.

After the election a Priest went up to my father and implicitly asked why did he not vote for himself. My father replied "I'm still young and can serve in many other ways for the Lord. If it was meant that I serve him this way, then so be it."

For my dad, it was not important that he oust someone else from giving back to the community. He felt that everyone had a purpose, and if public service, either in government or religious/community, motivated people to step up and serve, then why stop able-bodied persons from doing so.

The person who told us this held my father in high regard because he showed that you did not have to step on other people to serve if your purpose is public service. Stories like these remind me that even the smallest things you do, if your intentions are good, your life will be remembered in the hearts of all those you come across.

The photos posted are those of the lay minister "thingy" (sorry I forget the real term) my dad used to wear while serving communion and/or lecturing in church. One of them has a blood stain on it. His blood stain. Might have been in his car when he was shot. Possible because my father was on the way to Makati for a meeting with my mom when he was ambushed.

I still remember how they'd put my father as a lecturer during the early hours around 6am cause he was one of the few who could wake up and serve at that time. He'd also get the Tagalog shifts for he was rather proficient at it (I only found out that my dad's first language was Tagalog when I turned 13!).

Well, that was another glimpse of my father, the lay minister/lecturer servant of God who also happened to be an Executive Regional Trial Court Judge from Tanauan, Batangas trying Heinous Crimes. Life can be so colourful.

What's In Store this Halloween?

I started writing this post to give a heads up for the thought provoking post I've got for you this Halloween. October 31, I've got a post I didn't think would come up, but since I started this blog for a purpose, I might as well. It will make you think for those who like it, and it'll make you puke or get angry depending on who you are.

So I hope you are able to reflect and are somehow guided by them.

Here's a teaser

Spring Cleaning

Another semester has ended. Sooner or later I'll have to decide if another one will follow. For now, time to clean up the mess of cases, papers and books I had to read.

Every end of semester it amazes me how much I've read. I can honestly say one semester of law school is equivalent to my whole study time in high school and college put together. Never have I ached everyday from reading.

Here are a few pictures of the boxes and piles of readings I've gone through in a mere three months. Yes, I read them. Shocking, but true.

Whew.

Also shown is my makeshift study table which used to be a small dining table that I've placed in the living room I've commandeered (Since my sister has 2 whole rooms for her study and I've got a small nook and cranny side of a living room.)

So thats what it meant!

Visited my dad two days ago and was looking at his tombstone when I finally realised what his special signature represented.

Its on top of his tomb and looks like incoherent scribbles. After staring blindly I made out that it was a "V" followed by an "R" and small lines for Rosales.

Wow, after all this time I got it.

Hehe well I guess I'll have to wait before I can ask him.

It Puts in the whole fruit?

Was walking along High Street with my mom today and saw a few things that made me giggle. At the soap store Lush, was an advertisement about how they use natural ingredients.

Well, I'll let the ad speak for itself, but for those who can't see it, it says, "Lush really do put the whole fruit in" with a picture of a woman holding a long fruit and showing it to another woman. Get it? Of course you don.t

Anti-Climactic Ending

The last test for finals in-class was Negotiable Instruments Law.

It was relatively anti-climactic as it was mostly true or false. Nonetheless, I hope everyone did well.

Now, the only subject left is Forensic Medicine, which has two papers left. The finals and the book report.

The book report is on the guy's book on the Ninoy Aquino assassination. I'll try doing it later after playing some Batman Arkham Asylum.

I had an impromptu inuman (drinking party) at my place last night. People came over from the block. It was pleasant and prolonged my Batman experience a bit more.

Things ended around 4am with the last person leaving. Even when I tried to clean up the mess, I still left enough to make Elna's morning a bit busy

Attached are some old pictures of my block with now Supreme Court Justice Diosdado Peralta. He was one of the Justices of the SandiganBayan that found Erap guilty of plunder.

Independence Day! Sort of

Today, I declare, My Independence day!

Last day of formal tests! Yahoooooooo!!!!

After this, a book report and a take home exam and I am off to play Batman Arkham Asylum! yay!!!!


Xbox 360, we've been apart for way too long.

aside. Blogger finally working again, the buttons seem to come out, google you suck!

Day 3

Day 3 of finals, but apparently 4 days have passed. Already dead tired but we're only half way through. Dear me.

Tired As Hell!

First day of finals and I'm tired as hell. Tis the life, but oh well, we shall see how all this goes.

I've had 8 hours of sleep for the past 3 days. Did not get to sleep last night and I've been running on pure adrenaline the whole night. Now that I'm in bed I can feel myself passing out. I'm just going to post some really old pictures just for the people out there who are getting bored staring at me rambling.

Google's dashboard for blogspot is messed up again and its always so hard to post picture, but here they are. Totally random pictures from my past. You might know a few of them. Who knows?

If you're gonna grab photos, please cite your source ;)

Thanks for looking!

Productive Study Day

Today was a more productive study day. As I type this, its about 3am here and I'm only about to start winding down from a long day of reading, reading and more reading.

Late tonight my brain went on sponge mode and it felt great. One of those few occassions my brain has gone in the zone during a read.

Only had 3 hours of sleep though so I'm hoping I can make up a bit more today, but at this rate I might not cause its getting pretty late and I've got some Forensic Medicine class in the morning. Oh well!

Coffee go go go!

This is It!

Finals!

People just left the house now reviewing. Brain was too mushed from all the reading today so I wasn't really able to get much done. I'm hoping I'll be able to sleep soon and start a new day, fresh and ready so I can move on to the next topic ASAP.

Hopefully this will not be it for me! Then again, life will always go on.

And It Does Bite Us Back

I previously wrote that our numerous holidays will certainly bite us back in the ass.

It has and it will for the rest of the week. We are having make up classes pretty much everyday of the week and I'm going nuts trying to read all these cases for Property and Sales.

I'm so tired cause of having to read morning, then have class from 2 to 9pm. then read again. I'm close to my tipping point considering the other things I have to do.

I pray to God that his gives me the energy to go through this.


Maybe this will finally guide me to whether or not I'll stay in law. Is this life worth it?

On a side note, I saw Grip Bueta in school today. He was asking if mom would still accept donations for typhoon ondoy victims. I said yes for my mom and he said he'd call me as soon as they find extra sacks of cloths to donate.

Whatever they give is something more that those who have lost everything can look forward to. Kudos to Grip, I known that guy since we were in prep and nursery in Xavier. He's a good man that know how to play the game. Wish him the best.

Too Many Holidays Will Bite Us Back

This semester we have had more holidays than I can remember for any other semester in my undergrad and post-grad life.

We had one week of no classes (six days from Monday to Saturday) because of swine flu. Then we had two Mondays because of a typhoon. Then two other days to commemorate two people, the founder of Iglesia Ni Kristo, Eddie Manalo, and our former President Cory Aquino.

Typhoon Ondoy gave us another whole week, six days!

The total being more or less 3 weeks of no classes for this semester. I have some subjects that are barely halfway through and finals will be in a week!

The situation must be pretty dire for other schools as well. A Congressman recently proposed that professors in college give extra credit for those who volunteered during relief efforts for typhoon Ondoy.

I love vacations just as much as the next guy, but this might be too big a risk for my academic future. Grades are not everything, but I can only wish that maybe, just maybe, the school administration will be a bit more lenient with our grades, hopefully letting us pass this semester, in light of the fact that this is the worst flood we've had in more than fifty years. For some this is the worst flood ever!

An act of God is surely way beyond the control or foreseeable event that a simple student (almost typed stupid hehe) can avoid.

I pray we get some kind of academic break (the same way Marcos let everyone pass the semester when he declared martial law long time ago).

its not like we planned all these holidays and tragedies.

Spreading Fear

I Feel bad for the many victims of typhoon Ondoy but it irks me to see squatters taking advantage of relief operations by pretending to be affected by the floods and lining up repeatedly to get food from the relief centers and storing the food for their personal consumption.

I know they are desperate for food, but once they get one, they should learn to just hold back and let those who have less than they do get something. bleh selfish (I'm no saint either but I've got a trigger conscience that will pop up).

I also find it amusing how people panic and start sending messages through twitter and facebook without thinking about what they are posting. Floodgates opening at the Marikina Dam? there is no Marikina Dam! Pepeng will be stronger than typhoon katrina?!? what was their basis? I'm sure they had good intentions and its better people are conscious and active, but where do we draw the line between sharing information for the people's benefit and just feeding the fear?

One cool thing I've learned is that the US Military weather forecasts are way more accurate than our own PAGASA. Not to blame PAGASA's people, they do the best they can, but they are limited by the equipment our poor government affords them. The US Military weather forecasts on the other hand are so spot on, and I'm sure they would be given that they are made to protect billion dollar war ships out in the sea, that if you read their reports, you will be certain to a high degree that it will happen.

When I got my gut feel that this typhoon Pepeng would not hit and fizzle, I looked up the US weather tracker called the Joint Weather Tracking Center found here

Check out the JWTC by clicking here.

I guess until the next tragedy, we can pray that we will be more prepared.